How to move from surviving to thriving
This post is inspired by a conversation I had with a client a few weeks ago. A big pitch that she has been working on for the longest time had been pulled, and she wanted to retreat and take the day off since it really affected her. But, aside from wanting to get away, she started blaming herself for the wrong things she might have done.
How do you deal when things don't go your way?
Do you face up to them and deal with them or do you blame yourself and then hide away and wait until the problem goes away?
If you're the latter, you might not realise it, but hiding away has become your defence mechanism. Running away from the problem is exhausting, and so is blaming yourself. They do nothing for you, and they just get you into a spiral of overthinking.
Instead, what you can do is get you into a place of thriving where you can face the challenge or problem objectively. You can do this by answering the resetting questions below:
👉🏾Are I nourishing myself properly?
This may seem like a silly question to include here, but most of the time, you can get irritated by the simplest things just because of hunger and poor nutrition. So when you get irritated or affected too much by challenges, check in with your energy levels, identify if you are eating just for fuel or could you be making better choices for nourishment and sustenance?
👉🏾What is the problem that I'm actually trying to solve?
Sometimes the challenge comes up, and you get irate because you think it's that core thing that makes you feel a certain way. But actually, it is your feelings and your beliefs underneath it all that is triggering you. Being aware of how you react to adversity and what your immediate response is key. The challenge is the minor dot on a bigger landscape.
👉🏾What is one thing I can achieve in the next 30 minutes?
Pick one thing that could drive your focus, attention, and energy for the next 30 minutes, and just do that.
Could it be time for a stretch, a break, or even just taking deep breaths? Deep breathing (breathing deep into your belly, not just into your chest) can definitely help you get into a state of relaxation.
Allow yourself grace and just focus on the simple activities mentioned above. They may seem overly simple, but they will really calm you down and will make you feel a sense of satisfaction once you've accomplished that one thing!
👉🏾What do I need to de-prioritise?
Assess yourself if you (or your team) may have taken on too many responsibilities.
Are you trying to do too much that you can’t handle other tasks and your health and wellness have fallen away? Take note of tasks you can eliminate, delegate, or save for later just to get you more breathing room and make sure you're still doing quality work.
These questions will allow you to understand the things that are irritating you. You can use them to reset and get yourself back on track. You don't have to be in constant panic mode when you have these questions and bring them out every time you face a problem that you're tempted to run away from.
Don't get me wrong; it's fine to take a day off when you don't feel well enough to face up to things. However, when a day turns into a couple of days, turns into a week, then turns into a couple of weeks, and so on… that's when you want to move out of that "survival mode" and make a decision and action steps to get back into "thriving mode".
In the past two years, there have been a lot of things that happened that are beyond your control. But by doing this resetting routine, you can gain even a little bit of control over what's happening to you and within you.
Routines and rituals are your foundation each day to make sure you're in thriving mode. Most people think routines are too restrictive; however, they actually help you gain more freedom when you focus on the right routines to set in place.
When you join this month's masterclass, The Signature Rituals and Routines for Success, you will learn how to:
Understand your own personal effectiveness cycle: to understand the barriers to motivation
Increase self-regulation and self-leadership: to build better habits for holistic peak performance at work
Understand the consistent practices: needed to boost willpower and endurance during challenging times
Repeat excellence: in their working day to avoid burnout
See you on February 23 at 18:30-20:00 UK time!